My Partner’s Ex Bothers Me
If your partner’s ex bothers you and you don’t want to end up losing the great love of your life, you should be careful not to make very common mistakes due to intolerance, insecurities or jealousy .
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When starting a relationship, it is necessary to learn to accept the past of that person with whom you will share from now on. And in this regard, it is good to talk and learn about the people who were part of your love life in the past, especially if they now have a cordial or friendly relationship. But sometimes, it’s hard to know what to do when your partner’s most recent ex (or anyone else) bothers you.
Between emotions, distressing thoughts, prejudices and other issues, it is difficult to act in the most appropriate way. Is there a way to manage this properly? Fortunately, yes.
Here are some tips that can help you cope and prevent negative emotions from taking over.
Tips to better manage the situation
“Where there was fire, ashes remain” goes an old saying, and perhaps there is the crux of why it bothers us so much to interact with the person who was once the chosen one of our partner. However, it is a situation that we must learn to balance and control, if we really want to continue our relationship.
Learn to manage jealousy
Jealousy is bad companions and can undermine a relationship, to the point of destroying it completely. Learning to control them is essential to prevent them from being the fuel for manipulation and even violence.
Seeing your boyfriend’s ex can be very annoying, especially if you find her talking to your boyfriend as close friends, but it is necessary to learn not to get carried away by discomfort and create a scene.
You can handle the situation wisely. Scandals will only expose your insecurity and make you look bad.
If you have any concerns or questions, you should discuss them directly with your partner. Remember that maintaining a reasonable posture and using dialogue as a tool can go a long way towards solving any concern.
Whenever you have a question, contact your boyfriend directly. You may be able to work out your discomforts together by agreeing that you are both okay.
Avoid naming her in discussions
Although our partner’s ex annoys, we must avoid naming her or bringing her up in discussions. If there is something that irritates men, it is reproaches or comparisons with their previous women. Criticism of other people’s attitudes only convinces them that the problem is yours.
Be careful with social networks
With new technologies it is much easier to know in detail the lives and interactions of others. Falling into the error of accepting friend requests from the partner’s ex is an action that can be destructive. If you are not or are going to be her real friend, avoid having her on your social networks. Keep in mind that if you include your circle or network of contacts, you will tend to be aware of their stories and, at the same time, you will tend to feed all kinds of negative thoughts.
On the other hand, you should avoid spying on her if you want to keep a healthy perspective.
Be polite
If she appears at family gatherings as a television star greeting everyone, as if she is still part of the environment, avoid pouting.
It is convenient that you do not show that their presence disturbs, bothers you, bothers you, and so on. Instead, try to be polite and friendly with her. Remember, she has her space and you have yours. She is part of a past time and you of the present.
In short, when your partner’s ex bothers you, the best tool to resolve concerns, build trust and maintain a healthy relationship will always be dialogue.
And remember, the past is over, what matters is the present and how you decide to manage it.