When They Don’t Let You Be You, When They Tear Off Your Wings

There are people like that, who tell you “you can’t, you don’t know, you don’t deserve .  ” They are profiles skilled in cutting off our wings and to which we are obliged to react: because we were born to fly high, not to be captives of other people’s prisons.

Now, when we talk about personal freedom, a lot of doubts can arise. Where do my rights begin? Where does my freedom end and yours begin?

Freedom is synonymous with respect

The answer is simpler than we think. Freedom is synonymous with respect and a word that, in turn, is combined with another equally beautiful: coexistence.

Although we are all very clear about what these two terms mean, sometimes we confuse them or, worse still, we orient them according to our own needs, according to private egoisms. If we think about it carefully, we will realize one thing: in our day to day there are an excess of “wing clippers”.

We are not talking only about those couples who violate the rights and self-esteem of their partners. There are also families that clip the wings of their children and prevent them from growing in maturity and autonomy.

Companies and many organizations also limit the potential of their workers by preferring them docile and obedient, part of a system where daring, creativity and innovation are synonymous with risk and are not well received. We undoubtedly live very complex realities that undermine, little by little, our personal growth. We encourage you to consider these simple questions to ponder.

You are made to fly, you have wings of your own

Each and every one of us has our own wings, even if we don’t see them. They are personal tools that we are obliged to develop to build our happiness, our own paths of self-realization. These “tools” or psychological structures that shape our wings are the following:

• Dignity: you are a person with the full right to fight for what you want, you are worthy of your dreams and your successes.
• Freedom: you are free to build the future you want for yourself day by day.
• Responsibility: If you want to be happy, you must invest in responsibility. You have the reins of your life, nobody else. Make bold decisions and be responsible for your mistakes and your successes.
• Courage: there is much more strength in you than you think. Although others tell you that “you can’t or don’t know”, in reality, you can and you do know.

If your wings break, repair them away from whoever hurt you

We already know what our wings are made of, of all those dimensions that act as inner strengths and that encourage us to be happy every day. Now, if at any time someone dares to attack your dignity, steal your freedom or make you believe that you have no value, flee.

• Put distance from the couple who tear off your wings to force you to reside in their personal universes, where you can stop thinking for yourself, where opinions and the right to grow personally are prohibited.
• Rebellion in front of the family that prevents you from being yourself, that imposes beliefs, value judgments and demands on you that do not go with you.
• Protect yourself from those jobs where your wings are also clipped, where you cannot prove your worth and turn you into one more piece of a gear that, day by day, brings you unhappiness.

There are people who cannot fly

Believe it or not, there are many people who walk their personal paths without having spread their wings yet. These are the reasons why they have not succeeded:

• They are personality profiles subject to the expectations of others. They do, think and value life according to what others want or expect of them.

• At the same time, it is common that they have not invested time and efforts in getting to know each other, in fostering that self-care with which to promote self-esteem, self-concept, assertiveness and that personal courage to express what one wants, what one needs.
• Last but not least, there are people who in the past wore beautiful and spectacular wings. However, due to a bad experience, traumatic relationship, or loss, they have never been deployed again.

You have an obligation to take care of your wings

We know that the concept of wings is nothing more than a metaphor. However, nothing offers us a clearer example of what personal growth symbolizes.

• The wings are synonymous with freedom, and that word is a dimension that we take care of every day in our own person and in others.
• We all have wings to fly and roots that bind us to what we love.

You are therefore obliged to take care of them, to attend to them at every moment to feel good, to improve yourself more and more and advance, little by little, towards that calm where authentic well-being is.